The skeletons are out of our closet this year and we're bad to the bone!
This year is Stella's first year trick or treating. Last year she was still so tiny, and I carried her around in a baby pouch strapped to me to keep her warm. At first she helped me hand out candy at the door and she was having fun, but when we took her to the neighbor's house, and she knocked on the door and discovered she could get candy her expression was priceless. She lit up. I stayed home, sitting out front with my dad, grandpa, and stepmom. Since I broke my toe a couple of days ago, I'm not walking very well. It's still aching pretty good. I played my favorite curated Halloween song list and enjoyed all the kiddos running amuck outside.
Halloween is my favorite. October kicks off the most beautiful month, then the holidays begin with Halloween. October is truly the best.
I made chilli and cornbread as usual for our Halloween dinner. Only this time I added a bit of cinnamon, aged rum, and vanilla to my seasoning, and everyone really liked it.
Clara is getting so big. She skips about, running form house to house now. Gone are the days when she was a teeny toddler and scared to go trick or treating. It's fun to see her open up and have fun. She's usually so shy and closed up, but she feels at ease in her surroundings and is confident walking around the neighborhood. She was very good to Stella, helping her along at times. Stella is pretty independent though, and it only took her once to figure out what this trick or treating stuff is all about.
I wasn't going to do Halloween this year. I didn't feel like decorating or dressing up. I didn't feel like doing our normal photoshoot. However, after much poking, prodding, and pleading from Clara and even from Jack, who usually doesn't care much about my decorating and dressing up but goes along with it, was pushing me to do it. It's been so difficult since my mom died. This was her favorite time of year, too. I;m missing her terribly, and I just didn't have the oomph to want to do anything. Once we got going though, it felt good to have the house cozy and decorated. It was fun to see the kids enjoying their costumes, and I'm happy to have photos of the kids. Memories and traditions are so important. They give more meaning and purpose, and now I don't want to imagine how worse off I'd have felt if I hadn't done anything. I'm sure mom would be happy to know I didn't give up on this, and jsut mope around being sad. Even if I am sad. She would love to see her grandbabies happy, smiling, having fun, and taking lots of photos for her to see if she was here.
And knowing this time of year is the best time of year for spirits to connect, as the veil is thin, she's on my mind even more, if that's possible with as much as she is already. I have no doubt she spent time with all her grandbabies today, looking over them. I miss you, mom. Love you to the moon and back.
Everything Allison Attitude 2021
Written with the intention to preserve my own thoughts and memories, and to pass down to my children.