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First high school dance. First kiss. I never felt so much like a mom and so old, too, as I drove a couple teens, eek my teen, to their first dance. My 70s Pandora station playing in the car. Saturday night was homecoming. He was super nervous all day to go pick up his date. She met her in 8th grade, and they seem to be pretty good friends. He thought the dance started at 7, and I didn't check his ticket to see for sure, figuring he's a freshman now, he should be able to read it lol. So we went to pick up the girl an hour and half early. Luckily she was ready. I told them I wanted a quick pic before they got in the car. They awkwardly agreed. At first they were standing like 3 feet apart from each other, and I told them to get closer, and their faces turned red. I said, "well you guys are friends, it's no big deal to have a picture taken as friends, just be friends." They were still about a foot apart from each other, blank stares, and so I suggested William to put his arm around her, if they felt okay with it. They both giggled and said yes. Then it was all smiles after that. I dropped them off for an ice cream cone before the dance, and went back to get them an hour later, since they had time to burn. On the ride to the ice cream place, we all talked. I could tell the kids felt nervous as heck still. She is very sweet, and talked about loving art, sewing stuffed animals, and being creative. She was really nervous about her tan lines, her hair, and her dress. It was all really sweet and cute. William opened doors for her, and remembered to compliment her, too. I've never seen him so nervous around a girl before. When Jack and William came home after the dance, they stood in the garage talking for quite some time. William told me, " yeah it was really fun mom." I prodded for more details, wanting him to tell me more about his first dance as a freshman in high school. He happened to leave out the part the he got his first kiss. Later that night, when Jack came upstairs to get ready for bed, he told me all about it. The girl approached William gave him a fast peck on the lips and ran off giggling back to her friends. He explained that William said he hadn't a clue what to do after, but really likes the girl. I know I keep saying it, but I'm still getting used to my son being in high school, liking a girl, being taller than me, and everything else that has come with this year. He has changed a lot. I'm just so happy he had a great time, and likes a really nice girl that he's had a chance to be friends with first.  
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 HOW DO I HAVE A HIGH SCHOOLER?! William started high school about 3 weeks ago. I took him and Clara for registration day and I felt so many emotions. I love how excited he is to be in high school, but so sad that my baby boy isn't a baby, and really hasn't been for so long, but now he's taller than me, stronger than me, and mouthy, but not mouthier than me, hahaha. I took him out shopping for a suit recently because he asked a girl out to the homecoming dance. She seemed excited to go, but then this last last week told him she decided she doesn't want to go to the dance. He was sad about it, because I guess he's liked her since middle school. It's not easy seeing him grow up. I mean of course I want to see him grow up, and I'm enjoying it, but he just asked a girl out to his first high school dance and already feeling the blues of a girl changing her mind and not wanting to g out with him. Which made me think of how hard it'll be to see him when he goes through his first heartbreak. I mean he was a bit sad that the girl isn't going with him now, but you know what I mean, when he actually starts dating a girl, and that inevitable first crushing heartbreak of highschool happens. My heart isn't ready for him to be a teenager in highschool, but because I'm a mom, my heart is also ready to be there for him for whatever he needs and to love him and encourage him through everything that comes up with highschool. He joined Junior Air Force ROTC. I'm over the moon about this decision he made. I was in both Navy and Army ROTC in high school and they are hands down the best memories of high school that I have. There's nothing that compares to my memories of ROTC in high school. I loved the program, my friends, the teams, competitions, trips, the pride I took in my uniform, and being a part of something, a tribe so to speak. I found my people in high school. William was really inspired when we toured the Mountain Home Air Force Base for an Idaho William video we made years ago. He has said since then that he really wants to join the Air Force, so when he learned his high school has a JAFROTC he lit up. He's joined color guard, drill team, and rocket team. I can't wait to see him compete and be in parades, and tell me about all the fun stuff he is doing in the program. I love to hear about the new kids he's meeting through the program. I stopped in to mee this instructors this week. We talked about thier JAFROTC program, the things coming up for the school year,and about my experienced in ROTC. They welcomed me to come by anytime to take pictures of William during practice and his teams. And again, in one breath I'm so happy for William, and then my thoughts trail off to if he joins the military, and how that's only four short years away. Don't even me get me going. For now, I just have to parent him through high school. Let's just stay in the present now, because that's a lot as it is. William had a super tough time with middle school, but it's clear to both of us that high school is going to be exceptionally better for him, and I totally relate. Middle school sucked, and I think most people can agree middle school years are tough, and high school is a whole different and better ball game. ;) This kid. He loves the 80s He is always runnin around with daydreams in his head. Often he is dressed for knight's battle, typically made of some strip of fabric, rope, and duct tape, sometimes in costume, sometimes he will just pull stuff from my closet and his to come up with something all his own. He is crazy, silly, and he is a moody 13 year old. I am crazy about him, and he is my biggest boy crush. I am sooooo happy you let me take some photos of you today. I have missed this!  For all the dreams and schemes, people are as they seem On a hot summer night Don't be no fun, don't forget you're young On a hot summer night - Billy Idol  Math has never been easy for me. I spent most of my childhood and teen years and even some of college, in tears, because math was so dang hard for me. I have found myself frustrated at times trying to teach my son when it comes to math, because to this day, when I see math problems my brain goes into panic mode in a split second. It seems no matter how many times I sit and work on math I forget formulas every single time. We are now starting a new curriculum through Oak Meadows distance learning. Lesson one begins with fractions, so right off the bat I am feeling discouraged, but thankfully this curriculum comes with a teacher's manual. However, after going through the manual and instructions, I seemed to be spacing out from the get go. I might as well be trying to read Chinese. It took me an hour, but I got through two problems and refreshed my memory on a couple simple fractions. The second one ended up being an improper fraction and I had to remember how to simplify that. After spending fifteen minutes trying to remember, and messing up over and over, I finally looked for a Youtube video, In the end we got through 12 problems, no tears, and had fun. So if you need a refresher yourself, here ya go, or maybe just a laugh at my expense. ;) William is drawing a cat dragon, yes half cat and half dragon. He asks me what can it breathe instead of fire. I said, "smoked salmon." Then laughed as I thought I was clever. He says, " no, smoked salmon, really mom?" So I said, " okay tuna breath?" He is currently drawing tunas come from catdragon's mouth onto the people below.
While pacing the floors with Clara in my arms, singing Hush Little Baby to her, William asks, " So how much money does this mother have?"
 Video rental stores and record shops have been a monthly if not weekly part of my life since I was a kid. I remember going to rent movies with my parents when I was a kid. When I was 17 I worked in a Blockbuster. I remember Blockbuster’s heyday, when every person I knew frequented the store on Friday nights to look for the latest movie release. I remember kids hitting the local record shop for the latest music album. I also remember when Blockbuster closed its doors. The digital age has been reinventing how we are entertained. Instant gratification is now in demand. Everything is online, at our fingertips, and ready to be downloaded to our handheld devices and TVs. Over the years I have seen writing with pen and paper go out of style, no more letters in the mail, photographs not being printed, and film being replaced with digital media. I do love a lot about this new digital era, but I also am a bit old fashioned I guess, and I love the smell of books, I like the sound of pencil gliding over paper, the nostalgic sound of music recorded onto vinyl, and the look of movies when they were made on actual film. I remember working at the local movie theatre as a teen too. My favorite part of the job was working upstairs in the projection room, threading the filmstrip through a projector. I liked the clicking sound of it as it started up. One time I threaded a movie incorrectly and the movie looked like it was melting on the screen, and I had to run upstairs to stop the projector and splice the filmstrip to save what I could.  When people around the country were losing their Blockbusters and movie/music stores Boise, ID had Hastings. For the last 13 years that I have lived here I have been able to go to Hastings and rent movies, look for books and music. My 12 year old son has loved frequenting the store as a Friday night ritual, looking for movies, perusing books, video games, and music. When we heard that Hastings is closing, we decided to do a short, casual photo session. He is so excited to have these photos, memories of one his favorite stores. Did I shoot them digitally, you bet I did, but I won’t let them just sit on my computer either. I am printing the photos for him to put in an album, so he can look back whenever he feels the desire to reminisce in the future. The days of “be kind, please rewind” have long been over and soon DVDs will not be for sale as well. The excited feeling of standing in line waiting to check out with the new releases, if you were lucky enough to grab one before another shopper did, or going to the video wall only to discover they were all checked out and then asking the clerk if he had any copies in his retuned discs stash behind the counter, hoping to get lucky. The days of rummaging through old movies, or the special interest section, looking for something to watch, those days are gone too. Of course everything is online, and we can watch many things instantly now, no lines, we don’t even have to get dressed and leave the house, and if you can’t find something instantly, you can still find it for purchase and wait for it to be delivered through the mail.     Modern conveniences are awesome, but I will always love the smell of a book, the sound of a record playing, and miss the excitement of hitting up the rental store for a flick to watch. I will remember when I was dating my husband, and even after getting married, walking through the store, holding his hand, and talking about what to rent, or standing there with a movie in my hand and a perfect stranger comments on the movie, or looking over to see the person standing next to me mulling over whether or not to check out the movie in their hand, and they turn to ask if I have seen it, and we chat for a minute. There’s that too, holding the actual movie in my hand, looking at the actual covers for the movie. I loved picking up a movie, looking at the cover and photos, and reading the description on the back. It’s just not the same on Netflix, or Redbox, or any other online service. I will remember, even as present as my pregnancy this year, walking through the store, my hand rubbing my belly, not really feeling like taking my swollen, tired self to a movie theatre, so I would go check out a movie with my son and husband. Then of course there is always chatting with the cashier about whatever movie we decided on. It’s going to be different, gone, the human interaction, those little, sweet moments; replaced with instant gratification and less conversation.       It was fun to take one last stroll through Hastings with my son. It was quiet and I enjoyed snapping a few photos to capture memories for both of us. As we walked through the store, William stopped, put his hand on Clara’s head, I was wearing her in a wrap, and he said, “Clara won’t know what it’s like coming to a store like this. This is first and last time for her in a video shop mom, and she won’t even know it or remember it. Things will be so different for her when she is growing up.” That’s just life, things change, and we all adapt, and move on to the next latest, greatest thing, but for some of us we will have memories of an era gone by. Video stores will become as nostalgic as drive -ins, and roller-skating rinks, and many other things that have become a part of the past.      Follow our other websites too: www.idahochildrensphotography.com www.womanoftheabyss.com www.idahowilliam.com  You have been an only child for 12 years. You know how to entertain yourself, and you have your own world that you live in 95% of the time. Your heart is sweet and sensitive, but your all boy that loves to run in the streets of the neighborhood with all the other boys playing war games, sword fighting, wrestling, and riding bikes, and at nearing 12 years old, you still love stuffed animals. I sit quietly and watch you as the battle on the coffee table unfolds. Most of the time I have no idea what you're talking about when it comes to the names of the worlds you create, what land which knight is from, and why they are at war. You are so passionate about it, and although I don't always understand what sounds like jibber jabber fantasy world games you are talking about, I love to watch you play, and I love that you are so creative and have a wild imagination. As the time draws closer for your little sister to arrive, I feel twinges of sadness to see you so big already. I remember you being a newborn like it was yesterday. My mind sometimes can't wrap around how fast time seems to go, and how you got to be nearly as tall as me. Childhood is fleeting, and the first year of life is even faster, passing in a blink of an eye. Although I wish I could just slow it all down, and let you be a kid even longer, I know that within a few years you will be driving, and becoming more independent than you already are.  So I will soak in as much as I can. Capturing the moments and memories of your youth that I don't want to forget, and want you to remember about yourself when you are older, and the world tries to change you. I know you are going to be a fantastic big brother. You already love your little sister so much. Every day you talk about how excited you are to hold her, and teach her things. I know at times we drive one another crazy. Sometimes it truly feels like you and I are definitely from different planets, but there is so much love between us, and we never miss a day without hugs, kisses, and I love you's. I realized we haven't called you munchkin in a long while. You were so cute as a toddler, we called you munchkin for years, and you always said, 'munkin.' I still call you hunny bunny time to time. I think of the cute ways you used to say things, like 'lellow,' instead of yellow, 'shouwyer' instead of shower, and I don't even know how to spell out how you said shower, but it was cute, and we still laugh about it at times, or 'grill,' instead of girl. I know someday, probably before I am ready, you will be on your own, you will have your own family eventually, and I will see the man you grow into, but in my heart you will always be my baby boy.      I love you William, Love Momma Check out these websites too! www.idahochildrensphotography.com www.womanoftheabyss.com www.idahowilliam.com  I overheard William (11) and his friend Aiden (9) talking today about being big brothers.
William: “Dude, when my little brother or sister is 5, and your little brother is 6 or 7, we are going to be like 17, we will be old.” Aiden: “I know.” William: “One day I am going to call you up and ask you what you are doing and you are going to say, “Man, I’m babysitting. What are you doing?” and I am going to be like, “yeah, me too, I am babysitting, because we are old, so our parents will ask us to babysit and stuff.” Aiden: “yeah, I know my mom will tell me to babysit all the time.” William: “yeah, so we will be talking on the phone, and I will just say let’s take these kids to the park, and we will sit on a bench and talk, because we are going to be 17 and old. We will watch them play.” Aiden: “Dude, that is old. Aug 12, 2015 Waimea Lookout |
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